Elvin Ng

i am not really a fan of Singaporean series. but when i watch Kinship, i fell in love with this guy.. Elvin Ng. i dont know why.. he reminds me of someone i left a year ago. someone who was very patient with all my stupidity. anyone who knows my past will know who am i talking about. see elvin's lips.. similar to his lips. i know. coz i kissed those lips. err, not elvin's.. see elvin's eyes.. nose.. i love the nose.. up till today. i have been telling my friends, i have forgotten our time, past is past, he is my history. its not coming from the bottom of my heart.. i say i love someone else, its a lie. i reckon that if i have other source of interest, i would really let go of this past. but i couldnt.

i know he does not like me to compare him with other man, but i can help it.. i think of him everytime i watch love movie/series. my mum used to say, i am so ungrateful. i left him without any particular reason. i do actually have my own reason.. i dont have to tell the world, my own problem. i have a problem. our relationship.

i want to be with him again, after i overcome this problem of mine, but then, another problem occur. i found out that the guy i used to bug, loves me. i dont have heart to break his heart. although he never said a thing, i know his feelings, the way he treated me. the way he looks at me. the way he talks to me. i always say that i love this guy. its all me to be blamed. i dont expect things to go this way. and and, another problem is, i cant stop thinking about someone. i dont want a new relationship is because i cannot let go of my past. i'm not ready yet.

and, there is another two guys i rejected. sorry guys. i didnt mean to hurt you..

~I gave you my love in vain

My body never knew such pleasure,

My heart never knew such pain

And you

You left me so confused~

(okay, yg ani, offside. sorry hahahahaha)